I am totally enjoying my summer vacation!
So I got this cute email that I am blogging:)
Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity
Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick
Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah
Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind
Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football
Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vannah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Ad'lanna
Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler
Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon
The Nail Salon
Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food
More Suthen-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them......... you "PITCH" them.
____
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
____
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder."
____
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: "Going to town, be back directly."
_____
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table.
____
All Southerners know exactly when "by & by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.
____
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin!
____
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" & "a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20!
____
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, & po' white trash.
____
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.
____
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
____
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, and when we're "in line,"... we talk to everybody!
____
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.
____
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
____
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
____
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
____
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," You know you're in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
____
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" & "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it --we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
____
A true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway, you just say,"Bless her heart"...& go your own way.
____
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take 2 tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning. Bless your heart!
____
To those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff......bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a 2nd language!
____
For those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long time, all y'all need is a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !
Now...... Shugah, send this to someone who was raised in the South or wish they had been! If you're a Northern transplant, bless your little heart, fake it.
We know you got here as fast as you could.
